Helene by Jay Pfeiffer
Contributed By: MAnnSnider1 · 7 May 2014 ·
HELENE ELIZABETH SEIFERT TOLMAN PFEIFFER
Sept. 30, 1895 – June 11 1952
given by Jay Pfeiffer
It made me feel good to be asked to gather thoughts on our Mama for this reunion. I didn’t appreciate Mama at the time of her death. Now I do.
The best way for you to know about Helene is to hear the thoughts of those who loved and knew her. So, each of her children have sent their thoughts.
A little background first. She was born in Dresden, Germany. When she was young, Carl and Anna brought the family to America. She was the fourth child of Carl and Anna Seifert, our root stock. Helene never grew tall. She just fit under the armpit of Ezra Tolman, her first husband. He was over 6 feet tall. They had a short but happy marriage producing three cute daughters Gertrude, Lareine, and Helen.
These are the memories of Lareine:
“As for memories of Mama, it’s hard to put my thoughts on paper for things that would interest outsiders. I think of her for the standards she gave us to live by. Her saying was always “Do as I say, not as I do.” I can now understand her reasoning. She was always so generous with herself and all her worldly possessions. She always enjoyed a good time.
I think she paid for her time here on earth by how she trained us to be good mothers, fathers, and housekeepers. She taught us all of the fine arts with your hands. She very seldom sat without having some handiwork in her hands be it knitting, tatting or crocheting.”
Mitzi’s memories did not arrive in time to incorporate in our talk.
These are Betty’s memories:
“I was born into a kind family. Mama insisted on it. She told us a story I”ll always remember (obviously) about a little boy who broke his arm and of another little boy who laughed and made fun of him. Later in the story the little boy who laughed, broke his arm and he didn’t think it was so funny.
We used to take trips to the beach, all 7 of us, packed into our ’27 Chevy. One day we passed an ice cream truck that was tipped over. I remember saying, ‘Wow, let’s stop and we can get a free ice cream.’ There was a moment of silence. Mama said, ‘That poor man just lost his truck and now you want to take his ice cream. Shame on you.’
Mama worked full time at May Company my whole childhood. I never remember her being too tired to listen to our problems, or laugh at our foolishness.
In grammar school Jay and I came home for lunch and relished the homemade soup Mama had made before going to work.
I enjoyed drawing as a child and there never seemed to be enough blank paper. I used to carefully remove the fly leaves from all the books in our home and use them to draw on. I’m sure Mama was aware of this but she never said a word.
Mama loved babies and I’m sorry she didn’t get to see all of her grandchildren. They would have loved her, I know. I did and will love her forever.”
These are Helens’ memories.
“In 1918 Ezra Tolman died of pneumonia six days before I was born.
Life began in earnest for Helene. She left her 3 babies with our Grandmother Seifert and worked as housekeeper and cook in Hogle’s home in Salt Lake City.
Soon she met Jacob Pfeiffer who fell in love with her and her three girls. They moved to Southern California. Before long Mitzi was born into our family, then Betty and last of all our baby brother, Jay. For the most part of our lives we lived in East Los Angeles.
A sorrow came to our home. Just before Gertrude was eight years old, she got measles and pneumonia and died. This was a deep loss to Mama and all of us.
Jacob’s two sons, Bill and Fred came to live with us. They were older than the rest of us children and were great, big brothers. This was the depression time so everyone worked who could, even Mama. She got a job at May Co. as a wrapper.
Mama believed in education. She went to night school often and did all she could to improve herself and us. This love of school impressed me and helped kindle a desire within me to go to college. I can remember Mama would never help me with my spelling words by spelling them for me. She would say, ‘Go look it up in the dictionary.’ It isn’t that easy to find words in the dictionary and it often frustrated me, but I learned to use and respect the dictionary and still do.
Mama had great faith in us children that we would do as she taught us and obey our Heavenly Father’s commandments. I remember how surprised I was as a teenager when she gave me permission to go on a weekend to Victorville with a boy friend to a rodeo. I was true to her faith.
Mama was understanding as a wife and supportive of all Daddy did. Once Daddy needed a piece of screen. He cut a piece out of our screened back porch. Once he needed a rope so he used her clothes line. Mama did without many things to help him finish The Door of Life.
I can never remember my mother ever saying anything bad about anyone. She was strict but she made us feel that what we did was good and smart. She never put us down.
Our home was always open to our friends for meals or over night. The little we had we shared.
Her greatest gift to me was a love for all people and the love she somehow built within us to always love our brothers and sisters no matter what they did or said. She taught us to never take an imagined slight, hurt or mistake or a real mistake and use it to destroy or alter our love for our kin.
If we as a family group follow through on this example, we will be united and supportive of each other forever.
Jay’s Memories
I remember Mama always working. She taught me how to cook. She would tell me how to do the food and then go to work. The first time I made stew, I couldn’t remember whether she said flour or baking soda. I chose baking soda, and when she came home she tasted it and opened up some cans.
She was always trying new recipes and she was very good with herbs. She always made our food taste extra good.
One time we were playing baseball in the street. Mama was at bat. She swung at a ball and said ‘oh’. Her pants fell down. She just stepped out of them, picked them up and walked into the house. That was it.
I remember she always said she wanted her family to be independent before she died. I guess we were.
Being short as she was, she had a stick she used for picking clothes out of the washing machine and for spanking us. I remember I did something wrong and she grabbed the stick and I took off running. She just said ‘You’ll be back’. I was and she did.
Mama wasn’t really surprised when there was a death in the family, just at the person who died. She always said before a death her first husband always appeared at the end of her bed. He never said anything, he just stood there and looked sad.
Anytime we had a family gathering she always wanted to do all the cooking. She would cook everything. She would have people help her, but she wanted to do it all. Now as a family we all figure out what food to bring and then we meet. There are now 160 or 170 of us now on the Pfeiffer side of the family. We have to rent a hall on Thanksgiving and Christmas. We have had as high as 120 come.
It’s a great tribute to a little lady who was a – well- She was our Mother.
Mitzi’s memories.
I remember when I was young that my mother was very stern and didn’t mind using the rod. “That’s why I’m so sweet and unspoiled.” But when she really hurt she would purse her lips and knit like “HECK” unless it was crocheting. I think she Tatted when she was in a good mood cause she tried to teach me how only the thread being so small I didn’t have the patience.
My mother did laugh a lot and loved to play games like Black Jack and she’d get so excited when she’d win and she’d feel sorry if we lost all the matches so she’d give me some more so I wouldn’t have to set out of the game. She loved to play games. She really loved her pinochle games.
Mama worked hard to teach us table manners and fair play. She made sure we had a consciousness off good and evil.
I still remember how she and Daddy would run around the house chasing each other and laughing their heads off.
One of my fondest memories was when riding home in the old Jalopy, they’d start to sing songs and soon we’d all be singing and usually toward the end they’d sing “Memories” or “It’s a Long Way to Tiporary” or something like that.
If we got home late and cold she would fix Hot Lemonade, honey and ginger before we crawled in to our beds.
Visit FamilySearch to learn more about Helene Elizabeth Seifert. Visit the Thomas Tolman Family Organization to find out how you can get more involved in family history.